please behold the 24 Hours of Lemons race, in which you can only spend $500 total on a car to cross country race for 24 hours
named after the legendary 24 hour Le Mans race, Lemons rallies barely legal cars in an endurance race across America. had the privilege of sharing the freeway with this race and seeing the absolute art od this event
friendly-neighborhood-patriarch
This is so American I could CRY
oh this is nothing. some of my favorite lemons entries are:
an airplane stuck on a toyota minivan
this miata built by rocket scientists
the mr2 boat
the nyan cat bmw that i think actually played the song at all times
the homer simpson car built by uranium workers
this limo whose brakes caught on fire
the dumbest corolla and supra wearing funny hats
and so much more. 24 hours of lemons my beloved
The absolute metaphorical snarl that is a Limo modeled after the titanic called "unstoppable", whose breaks caught fire, is just, absolutely sending me
did i tell u guys i got into an argument on twitter bc i said foxes are dogs and someone tried to bring up their actual fuckin. classification or whatever and i just said “foxes are dogs cause they are fluffye” and they kept arguing with me. the entire time i was like “you will not survive the immigration to tumblr you are lucky we are not there right now”
This is especially funny because they aren’t even right. Foxes *ARE* dogs.
No they aren’t.
yes they are. because they are fluffye.
OK yes they are.
mr-system-of-a-downer
Dog
Dog
Different family, but same order as @pictures-of-dogs
No, they are the same family. They are the same kingdom, phylum, order and family. They separate at the genus.
They’re a dog.
yeah they’re fluffye
theyre literally not dogs theyre not even fluffy. can we get science tumblr over hear or what!?
checkmate athiests
fluffye
okay but they literally are dogs, for those who are confused
If foxes are dogs, then so are wolves, coyotes, dingoes, jackals, and several other extant and extinct species.
Behold! A dog.
of course it’s a dog you buffoon. it’s fluffye.
Why on earth would someone think “BUT IF THEY’RE DOGS SO AR -”
Like yes of course wolves are dogs, where have you been. Jackals are excellent doggies! So are coyotes. Why is this confusing.
I love that this is literally two completely different arguments running simultaneously.
That guy up there who said they’re not even fluffy was thinking of sharks
sharks are also dogs. ravenous water dogs, but still dogs
Sharks can NOT be dogs they are SMOOTH
Tags via @jenroses
If sharks aren’t dogs why are the Turkish calling them dogfish
this is a puppy and this is a puppy and this is a oh god
Is this a dog or a shark
It’s a land shark
Yeah, that doesn't prevent pregnancy.
Dfgajagakala it’s so you don’t get a UTI 😂
*facepalm* So, given that sex ed in the US is a tire fire:
Vagina-having people have a shorter urethra, which means we’re more prone to UTIs because the bacteria doesn’t have to travel as far to get up into your bladder and cause a problem.
Which means if you’re exposing your bits to bacteria (as with sex), peeing will flush out bacteria in the urethra. (Urine isn’t actually sterile - that’s a myth - but you’re *supposed to* have a little bit of bacteria - that’s how bodies work. But it still flushes things out that shouldn’t be there.)
Oh! You should ALSO pee after you masturbate, especially if it involves penetration with fingers/toys/etc
So I’ve blocked like five transphobes on this post, which I feel should have been relatively uncontroversial.
If you’re one of the people saying “You meant ‘women’”, fuck you. I meant “people who have a vagina, regardless of their gender or lack thereof”, and you can go fuck yourself with a cactus.
And you should pee afterward, so you don’t get a UTI.
The /gardening subreddit is actually full of hippie anti-plastic anti-lawn freaks (affectionate) and I find it enjoyable and I saw a nine-word horror story I thought tumblr would enjoy
The emotion in this photo
IF YOU NEED TO GET RID OF MINT, USE OTHER PLANTS IN THE MINT FAMILY!!!
Related plants like lavender, sage, and thyme are immune to mint’s phytotoxins and will crowd out the mint. Rosemary is my favorite mint-killer since it grows fast and wide (regular pruning helps it cover more area).
These plants are perennials, but they are likely to die after a season since mint can harbor root rot that will affect other Lamiaceae but not mint (or plants outside the family). Leave the plant waste to provide soil cover, the mint rhizomes may still be dormant (but will die out soon). The spring after your mint-killers die, you should get some colonizing vegetation. Once those plants fully take root, you’re good to plant whatever your heart desires in the soil!
IF YOU NEED TO GET
RID OF MINT, USE OTHER PLANTS
IN THE MINT FAMILY!!!
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
My ideal street layout, wide sidewalk, wide bike lanes, and a 2 lane road that only allows streetcars on it. Yes I know this a bad drawing, I made it in a hurry
Are those (black circles w/ small things) supposed to be eg cafe chairs?
If so, they’re posing an accessibility issue due to blocking the sidewalks. Recommend your street layout allow for outdoor seating without blocking sidewalks.
Agreed. The foundation is sound, but there needs to be plenty of space to walk by seating without getting run over by a bike. Seating that hugs the walls of the nearby structure, and open storefronts that let people and services flow seamlessly between the commercial spaces and the sidewalks would be an improvement here.
I actually shrunk the seating to make there be more space for pedestrians
If the tracked area is for trams/streetcars only, may I recommend that you make it green track?
Not only does it add much needed greenery to public spaces, but it also reduces heat at street level, reduces the running noise of trams and dramatically improves water drainage at street level. It even goes as far as reducing the damage to the tracks caused by the material expanding and buckling in high heat by simply keeping the rails cooler and better displacing heat.
It doesn't even have to be grass! Different species of plant, local species or hardier, low-maintenance species can be used, and furthermore, it tends to reduce maintenance costs of the tracks, as soil is easier to dig up than concrete or tarmac, and so the tracks can be accessed and worked on easier.
Obviously, if you want the street to be able to accept buses along with trams/streetcars, or other rubber-tyred vehicles, then a hard surface is necessary, but if it's light rail only, then green track gets my vote.
Already made the edit, I hope you enjoy the green tracks and their flowers. This image is very green
Redoing the color of the bike path to make the street less fucking green
I love the idea of green tracks, but in this case they are not a good choice:
You still need the possibility for rubber based vehicles like Fire Cars or Ambulances to pass the streets.
You can't just put them on tracks because they need to be as mobile as possible to allow maximum efficency.
Okay removing the grass due to firecodes
Urbanism pride flag lol
we still need green so maybe put flowerpots in the middle of the sidewalk? Like rectangular ones that only take up maybe a fifth of the sidewalk width, and their intermittent, maybe one between every other set of trees.
The street planters have come in
Honestly if you want some good green space you should consider bioswales between the bike facilities and the "street", which would help replace some of the lost drainage/filtration function from de-greening the track
The bios have been swaled
ALT@puddlebrigade Okay the tables have been moved and reduced to be more accessible and some planters have been moved
ALTThe large dark green dots are trees
Is it too soon for this?
Yes, you aren’t even on the current version
Sidewalk seems a little tight tbh
Sidewalk widened. Goal achieved
ALT@i-use-oxford-comma The benches have been added and @prawnhubpremium The dragon is opening a shop
ALTWe are making a good street
I made a 3d render of our street
Oh my god, that looks like a real place I could visit, I love this
Zepotha will never be Goncharov because when it comes down to it, tumblr culture is collaborative, while tiktok culture is merely iterative, and those are not the same thing.
Op I refuse to let your tags stay in the tags cause THIS!!!!!
Okay I've actually spent a half-day reading literature on this and squirting is fucking fascinating because we literally have no scientific consensus on what it is or why it happens.
We know the mechanics of how it works, mind you. There are actually two distinct phenomenon that lead to what we think of as "squirting" and "gushing." One of them is simply an expression of the Skene's gland, which is what produces vaginal fluid for lubrication during sex.
It's commonly thought to occur during orgasm, and it does, but not exclusively. We've conceptually tied it to the male orgasm, but that's really an erroneous idea. Squirting maybe has to do with intense arousal, but it also might just have to do with contraction of the right muscles at the right time. And we still don't know what makes some people's Skene's gland more prone to it while others are not.
The other, what we sometimes call "gushing," is more biomechanically complex. It's when a buildup of some kind of fluid in the urinary bladder is expelled through the urethra during sex. I say "some kind of fluid" because the science is super unclear on what it actually is.
There are only a small handful of studies with wildly conflicting results, and none of them have been replicated. A couple say it's largely urine. One says its a mix of urine and vaginal fluid. A couple say it's vaginal fluid only, or vaginal fluid with trace amounts of urine that only come from flushing the bladder and urinary tract.
But between small sample sizes, sampling biases toward white women, and biased interpretation (read as: patriarchal medicine), they all have major internal issues that make drawing broad conclusions totally impossible. And while we do know for sure the biomechanics of how it works--that is, where the fluid comes from a where it goes--we don't actually know how it gets there in the first place.
And, like squirting from the Skene's gland, we've conceptually tied it to the male orgasm in a way that isn't actually correct. Some surveys suggest that people who gush only do so during orgasm, but a lot of people report doing it after orgasm or even just during a state of high arousal or vigorous activity. And again, the surveys themselves are fairly biased in a way that many academic surveys are: they skew white, wealthy and western.
I say all of this in part because especially in the kink community there are a lot of misconceptions about it, and a lot of people--especially men--who are absolutely certain of their opinion about vaginas they do not have. I've put this kind of thing elsewhere on the internet and been barraged with comments about how so-called "female ejaculate" is 100% piss and people who don't like watersports but do like squirting/gushing are hypocrites.
And don't get it twisted: if piss play and/or squirting is your thing, go nuts. This isn't about kinkshaming. It's about pointing out one of the particularly misogynistic and pervasive ways kinky men use their kinks to spread misinformation and police the bodies of others.
It's also just another example of how medical science is biased against people with vaginas, especially non-white people with vaginas. Anyone who tells you they know what squirting and gushing are is wrong, because medical science doesn't entirely know. Also, anyone who makes fun of you for being a squirter or a gusher is a fucking loser.'
Some good stuff here⬆️⬆️
I cannot stress this enough, write it poorly. Write the shittiest draft you possibly can, stick 'ah fuck something happens here and now they're fighting' to get over
Write the worst fucking version you possibly can and stick it in a folder and forget it for a month or two before you look at it again. You know what you have now?
A first draft. And with enough time to think some new thoughts about it, you'll soon end up with a better, second draft! And eventually, you'll end up with something you'd be perfectly okay with letting other people read!
You'll never believe this process works no matter how many times you do it, but it totally does. You just have to drag your brain kicking and screaming to that blank page and get the bones down first.
Write the shit out of that shit.
Charles Dickens stared.
It was a good stare. Men with eyebrows like that tended to have good stares. He stared at the scene before him like an artist studying the work of a master, pouring over every detail, canyons of cogitation forming in the furrows of his magnificent eyebrows.
He said: “I think I’ve got it, now.”
The time traveller blinked. “Yeah?”
“This device-” Dickens gestured vaguely. “It might be an elaborate zoetrope. The players are not actually performing, but we see a succession of images that are played so quickly, the eye is fooled into believing that they may be so.”
“That’s. Definitely a way of looking at it.”
“And in this instance, the zoetrope is depicting something like a Punch and Judy show,” said Dickens. “Only by some cleverness, the professor operating the puppets has managed to make himself invisible.”
“Could be.”
Dickens sat back. “Then really, I don’t see what all the fuss is about. Although I do have one question.”
“Yes?”
“Why is Bob Cratchit a frog?”
The time traveller considered this. “Well,” he started. He stopped. “I guess - why not a frog?”
Charles Dickens’s magnificent eyebrows knotted together. Then he nodded. “Fair enough.”
We need like “unclench your jaw” posts but for eye strain. Like
Go look at something 20ft away for 20 seconds.
take off your glasses if you wear them for 20 seconds
Recommended by my optometrist
Look at something 20 feet away, then 10, then 5, then one, then if you can your nose.
Repeat twice, then again without glasses.
Face forward look out of the corner of your eye. As far as you can look. Slowly move to the other corner. Repeat twice.
Look down as far as you can. Slowly look up. Repeat twice.
Roll eyes twice.
Close eyes for five minutes.
I do this every day usually at my halfway point. My migraines went away. My vision go better. Honestly stretching my eyes as she put it feels great too.
